Managing Peers

Peers are ought to be the most fun part of an organization. So much so that you don’t have to "manage" them. Ideally, you could be your normal self and get away with it. Unless you are a creep, in which case fix yourself first. Being professional is still important. Be willing to help others especially when they are blocked. Unblock others first. They will like you and be willing to return the favors. Be reliable, trustworthy, and avoid gossiping. Give direct and honest feedback when solicited. Especially on code reviews. Be polite and understanding but direct.

With peers, ramble or brainstorm. It can be beneficial. After all, humans are storytelling animals, and just thinking out loud can help fix some of our problems. We grow with the osmosis effect that comes with sharing stories. Do not fear being wrong. If you are wrong and direct you will learn quickly. If you are wrong but not direct, you might not learn. If you are right and direct, you will help them learn quickly. You will do a disservice to yourself and your peers by not being direct. This is most important to know for engineers from eastern cultures that being direct is not equal to being rude. Eastern cultures, languages, and norms are usually high context and it’s sometimes hard for them to be direct because they think it’s rude.

Peers are going to be some of the most lasting professional and personal relations you will ever make. Find people you resonate with and talk about non-work. Eat and travel together. Make real connections. Cultivate a few close relationships over a long time. Develop a professional and personal network. It will help you in your career and life. There's an idea of having a personal board of directors. It is near impossible to do in remote companies though.

As for the professional environment, there is a difference based on the company’s size and structure. In a big company, there comes a time when you have to be a bit of a diplomat. Some level of politics in large companies is nearly inevitable. It is more prominent at a higher level but the culture can seep into engineers. With that said, remember that actions always precede reputation. Do more, talk less. In every company, there are talkers and doers. Talkers sometime take credit meant for those who do. If you find yourself in such a situation, be assertive and moderate. Keep a balance between doing and talking. If you are one of the talkers, shut your mouth and start doing. If you are one of the doers then talk where it’s necessary. Be assertive. Be moderate in doing vs talking. When in doubt, always be partial towards doing. In the long term, people who do the work win, almost always.

Be kind. Kindness is not a selfless trait. Be kind and it will help you in life and your career. It’s a selfish trait that appears selfless. Win-Win.

Take the blame, give credit. Think long-term. In this perspective, life is long and the world is small. You will be paid back for your kindness in full.

Do not whine about work with your peers all the time. Be the optimist. Optimism is contagious. See the silver lining and embrace it. Improve your working conditions. Where there are problems, there is opportunity. Solve it and you will learn and be rewarded.

This post is from a series of related posts about software engineering. It is part of an attempt to write a book in public. I seek your feedback. Raise your opinion. Share with people who can benefit from it. Contribute in the comments section, on social media, over a cup of coffee, or however you prefer. This will help me and the community tremendously.